


Stupid Cyrus Goodman

by orphan_account



Category: Andi Mack (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-21
Updated: 2019-04-24
Packaged: 2020-01-23 15:35:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18552670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: TJ Kippen is just one of those mean kids. Walking the halls with Reed and Lester, TJ gets anything he wants at school, if not at home. But then Buffy Driscoll insists on being on the basketball team. And wherever Buffy is, there's her overenthusiastic, brilliant, stupidly cute friend, Cyrus Goodman.TJ watches as Cyrus comes along and transforms him from one of those mean kids in the halls to someone he likes when he looks into the mirror. But even more, TJ finds himself liking Cyrus.Like, way more than he should.Stupid Cyrus Goodman.





	1. Fireworks

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter has SO much angst-but I promise there'll be less the next few parts!
> 
> I plan to update regularly. If all goes as hoped, this story will be fairly long. I look forward to writing it.
> 
> Thanks for reading!

The first time he had really acted like them had been about a year ago. TJ had been friends with Reed and Lester for a few weeks by then, ever since they all tried out for the basketball team. The three of them had been the only sixth graders that made it.

Reed and Lester were notorious bullies in the hallways. They picked on anyone they could, even seventh graders sometimes. TJ had seen kids literally part when the boys walked down the hallway, each with backpacks slung over one shoulder and brand new Nikes-the kind TJ had wanted to buy but his mother had told him no, because "Money doesn't grow on trees, you know." He had heard that Reed had punched a kid in the face a few weeks ago. He had watched Gus open his locker to find all of his schoolthings covered in shaving cream, and turn around to see a circle of boys snickering around Lester. But TJ didn't have many friends before the two of them came along, so he was grateful for them.

A little while after Reed and Lester befriended TJ, they had all hung out Reed's one day. The boys sat in the kitchen, sipping Gatorade after tossing a football in the grassy, abundant lawn. TJ had never had Gatorade before-just the off-brand version that tasted like plastic. He was swirling his around in the bottle when he heard Reed's voice speak up out of nowhere. "TJ, if you're gonna hang out with us, you might have to toughen up a little."

TJ had stared at his drink, seemingly fascinated by the blue liquid. Somehow, he had known this was coming. "What do you mean?" he mumbled.

TJ knew exactly what the blonde boy had meant, though. TJ had seemed out of place when Reed had taunted a boy a few days ago, just sitting there and watching it happen. 

Reed looked at Lester, who began to speak. "Well, the other day we heard some kids saying that you were some kind of pansy and that they didn't know why we were hangin' out with you."

TJ's mouth formed an O, but then he realized he must've looked really stupid like that. He snapped it shut. 

"Lester, I told you not to tell him that," Reed sneered meekly. Lester gave Reed a dirty look back.

TJ stood up. "I have to get home. My family wants me home for dinner."

Reed snorted. "Too good for us, huh?"

TJ widened his eyes. "No! Course I'll act more like you guys. I prob'ly did look dumb before. But, just, my Dad's cooking dinner tonight. See you tomorrow?"

"See you," Lester called as TJ made his way through the giant house, trying to locate the front door. Reed grunted some sort of goodbye.

When TJ had gotten home, he found his mother heating up some leftover vegetable stew and his sister Amber setting the table for three. His mother turned around and smiled. "You're home! " she said. "How are your friends?"

TJ nodded, shrugging. "They're fine," he said.

  
Not long after that day, Alex Goldberg, a small boy with long hair and glasses, bumped into Lester in the hallway. "Think you're better than us?" barked Reed. He looked at TJ, and TJ knew what this meant. He knew what he had to do.

"Show 'em, TJ" he barely heard Reed say.

Stepping forward so he was only inches from the boy, TJ grabbed the front of Alex's Star Trek shirt and lightly pushed him into the blue metal lockers. It didn't make as much noise as he wished it did. TJ pushed him up against the lockers. "Dork," he whisper-laughed. Lester and Reed smirked behind him.

But when he let the kid go and the crowd watching had dispersed, TJ stood there for a while. He had stared at the shiny lock dangling in front of him. He could've sworn he saw Reed in it instead of his own reflection. Because that laugh hadn't been a fake one.

\---

TJ stared into the mirror in front of him. The same boy stared back at him. He was a little taller with shorter hair, but the same freckles stood out against his fair skin. The same greenish-blue eyes flicked about,scanning his reflection.

\---

  
TJ had gotten meaner after that day, like he was turning into a Reed 2.0. Whenever he spat at someone or made a snide remark, sometimes even shoving them, it somehow relieved him of his problems for a little bit. If he couldn't control them, at least he could scare other people, giving him control of at least something. And even though he only did this occasionally, he could tell exactly what people thought of him. He was just another Reed. Just another bully. TJ wished they knew he couldn't help it when certain things happened.

Anytime Amber got straight-As again, or TJ got straight-Ds.

_Spit_

Anytime he wished he had seen his father less than a few weekends ago.

_Smirk._

Anytime he did _that thing_.

_Shove._

 ---

TJ glanced up from the mirror. He wondered what people saw when they recognized his face. The bully. The kid to stay away from. The sad thing was, he didn't know if anybody saw him as anything else.

He sighed and sat down on his bed, picking up his cell phone and logging onto Instagram. He scrolled through his classmates' pictures. Girls waving sparklers around and posing in front of fireworks displays. Guys smiling and laughing in group pictures on the beach. "Happy New Years!" read all of the captions.

TJ looked at the clock. It was 11:53. Stepping outside, he leaned against the shiny black rail in front of the apartment. For the past few years, the people that lived out East of him had let off fireworks at midnight. He would watch them with Amber and his mother. Tonight, Amber was at some 'high school party', as she had phrased it, and his mom was fast asleep, exhausted from picking up extra shifts at work.

When the clock struck twelve, he heard hollers coming from all around his apartment. "Twenty-eighteen!" Someone shouted.

TJ watched a burst of yellow fill the air, and then a shower of red. He heard his neighbor's dog bark, and a small crash two apartments over. Then, everything got quiet.

 


	2. Buffy Driscoll

TJ still couldn't believe he was the captain of the basketball team. It was a big accomplishment for him-if numbers confused him, at least he knew sports didn't.

Plus, the team followed him around and agreed with him on everything. It was like he had his own little set of followers. Reed had been a little mad two weeks ago when TJ got the title instead of him, but he got over it quickly, appreciative of the fact that TJ wouldn't bench him.

 

He stood by the bleachers, watching everyone file in for tryouts. He recognized most of the kids. Then he saw a girl in a pink shirt talking to a boy who was in a few of his classes. Was she here to try out? Surely not. Maybe she was just watching her friend.

 

But, sure enough, the girl grabbed a basketball and got in line, beginning to shoot hoops. TJ watched, clutching a ball in his hands. Was she just here to make some kind of statement? He couldn't stand people like that.

 

A few minutes later, he brushed past the girl, knocking her over. He didn't even think about it. Doing things like that were like second nature to him by now.

 

The girl looked seriously offended. She held a hand up, suggesting he help her up. He remained standing above her, smirking slightly. He wondered what she would say next. Would she get mad about his _unfair treatment_?

 

"That was a foul!" She complained, glaring at him.

 

TJ took a step further. "This is a drill. There aren't any fouls in a drill," he said coldly.

 

"What is your problem? You're the captain! Is this how you treat your teammates?" The girl asked him, her curls bobbing up and down as she talked.

 

"You'll never know," TJ glanced at her again and turned around, trying not to laugh at the girl's angered expression. He had been good at coming up with little smart remarks like that lately. It felt good saying things like that so quickly; at least people didn't have to know how stupid he actually was.

 

The next day, Coach Harper posted the results. TJ watched the girl read it, hugging her friends and even calling someone on her cell phone. He snorted. Then Buffy saw him and walked towards him.

 

"I don't think we were ever introduced," she said spryly. "I'm Buffy, the new shooting guard." TJ tried to bite back a smile. She had probably spent all night thinking that one up.

 

"That's funny. I thought you were the new benchwarmer," he said, earning laughs from the boys behind him. The girl looked surprised. Then he turned on his heel, his teammates following him. Finally, he had a teammate he could pick on.

 

  
In a few nights, TJ asked Amber if she knew Buffy. Amber's eyes had gotten as wide as saucers, and she set her bottle of nail polish down.

 

"So you do know her?"

 

"You could say that." Amber inspected her nails on her left hand, which were a bright shade of pink. "Damnit. I have to do my right now."

 

"What's bad about your right hand? And why do you know so many seventh graders? And you're even dating one, for God's sake!"

 

"No! It's not like I know that many! I mean, I know you, or course, and then I just know Jonah and his friends. So that means Andi, Cyrus..."

 

"And Buffy," TJ finished for Amber, even though he had no idea who Andi or Cyrus were.

 

Amber finished doing her nails. "How do you know them?" She glanced at TJ and back at the polish suggestively.

 

 TJ sighed. She used to do his nails when he was little. If their parents had fought that day, or if Amber knew TJ had just had a bad day in general, Amber would drag him to her room and get out the nail polish.  She would let him choose the color, and they would sit on her bed, his hands over a rag in case any spilled. Then she would let him do her nails, no matter how bad his painting skills were. He would always take the polish off right afterwards, but he enjoyed it. TJ would never admit it, though.

 

"C'mon, we haven't done it in forever!"

 

TJ grunted in defeat and held out his hands. Amber smiled, dipping the end of the brush into the bright pink bottle.

 

"You still haven't answered my question," she chirped. "How do you know Buffy?"

 

TJ rolled his eyes towards the back of his head, beginning the story. "So..."

 

It felt great to talk to Amber again. TJ didn't know why he hadn't in so long-maybe it was his jealousy. She always seemed to get As on tests without even trying, and she was one of the more popular kids at her high school. On top of that, she had gotten a new job at The Spoon recently. She could contribute to the family, but TJ couldn't. She had become the model child so suddenly-but what did that make him?

 

Regardless of the way he felt, TJ set off to find Amber a birthday present. He was going to find one next weekend, but talking with her last night made him want to do it earlier. He only had one sister, anyway.

 

At the Red Rooster, he thumbed through vinyl records. Amber's collection had grown once money wasn't so tight anymore. He was scanning the songs on the back of an Aerosmith record when he heard an all-too familiar voice.

 

"Hey."

 

It was Buffy. He knew he had aggravated her yesterday when he didn't let her play in the game. This was going to be fun.

 

"Hey," he said back. He looked her over.

 

"Normally, I would bite your head off, but I'm trying this new thing today where I don't," she said, sounding pretty dumb.

 

"Okay..." he trailed off.

 

"Look, I know it can be tough to be a leader," Buffy said, almost smiling at him. "So, I could help if you let me. What can I do to make things better with us?"

 

TJ stared at her for a moment. "Quit," he said sharply.

 

"Quit?" She barked. TJ snorted at her temper.

 

"Go play on a girls' team," he said to aggravate her more.

 

"There is no girls' team!" Buffy practically shouted.

 

TJ leaned up close to her. "That's not my problem." He chortled and watched her leave with a shorter boy that looked around their age. Could that be Cyrus? Amber had said that Cyrus and Buffy were inseparable.

 

Whoever he was, God, he was cute.

 

TJ's heart raced as he turned back around and scolded himself for thinking something like that. Doing _that thing_ again. He promised himself he would never do it again. He promised himself, just like last time and the time before that.


	3. I Don't

Basketball season was in full throttle. TJ spent much of his time practicing at the park, sometimes with Lester and Reed. He'd always go there the night before games, running around and practicing his shooting and passing. He had spent more time than usual at the courts yesterday, so he was confident he would do well at today's game. Just as long as Buffy stayed out of his way.

TJ stared at the girl as they filed into the gym. She stared back, brown eyes not so much as blinking. A year ago, he would've been pretty intimidated. But this TJ was just amused. Buffy really thought she would win this little war.

He didn't pass to her for the entirety of the game, like he had done the last game. Instead, he made as many shots as he could by himself. The game was like a blur of running, catching, and throwing. When TJ looked up at the scoreboard, the game was over. He knew his team had creamed their opponents.

_12-110_

What? How was that possible? TJ knew for a fact his team had made at least double the points as Shelburne Middle had. He blinked and looked again, trying to make sense of the numbers he saw.

TJ was interrupted by a gruff voice. "Why aren't you in the locker room with everybody else?"

TJ turned around to face his basketball coach. Had he been looking at the scoreboard for that long?

"Who won?" He asked, only then realizing how stupid he must've looked, asking as he stared directly up at the score.

"Us, son! Twenty four to seven. Whooped 'em," said Coach, too caught up in his own excitement to question TJ's inquiry.

TJ grinned. He knew it! Maybe he was too stupid to read, but he could play a mean game of basketball. "Okay, sir. I'll go to the locker room."

"Wait," said Coach Harper, holding out a hand. "I need to talk to you about something."

 

A tutor? What kind of math teacher would flunk him? And what kind of Coach would threaten to pull him off the team if he couldn't get his grade up? TJ couldn't believe it. And it wasn't like he was ever going to understand anything that went on in math class. Numbers just confused him, and that was the end of that. Nothing more. Did that mean he had to get kicked off the basketball team?

When TJ's mother got home that day, she made a beeline for his room.

She peeked her head in. TJ half-smiled at her.

"Can I come in?"

TJ's smile faded. He had a feeling he knew what this was about.

His mom sat down next to him on the bed. "I got an email today. From Mr. Collins. He said you were failing Algebra, and that you needed a tu-"

"I know, Mom," TJ interrupted.

"TJ, honey. I guess I just wanted to apologize. I've been so caught up with work lately, I haven't payed much attention to your school, or your grades. I wish I had realized this sooner."

TJ didn't speak.

His mother took a breath, tucking her graying blonde hair behind her ears. "So, I scheduled a session with the other Algebra teacher at Jefferson. I'm sure she's a very nice lady. You'll start after school next Monday. Of course you'll miss the bus, but Jefferson's always been walking distance from here."

His mother put a hand on TJ's shoulder when he failed to speak again. "Honey, I know you might not be happy about this, but it'll keep you on the team. I know how important that is to you."

With that, Ms. Kippen turned and slowly began to walk out. But just as she was in the doorway, her son spoke.

"Mom!"

Ms. Kippen whirled around, partly relieved TJ had spoken.

"What about Amber?"

TJ's mother's brow furrowed, like it always did when she was confused. "What do you mean?"

TJ snorted. "You know what I mean. Oh, and I know, you haven't been paying any attention to my school lately. But you seemed to know when Amber got a hundred on her last physics test. I don't know how much-Mom, can you name three of my teachers this year?"

His mother glanced at him sternly.

"You can't! I bet you don't even know the name of my new tutor!"

Ms. Kippen placed her hands on her hips, opening her mouth like she was going to say something but then closing it.

"And you act like you're so supportive of my basketball! Do you know the last time I saw you, or Dad, or Amber, or anybody watching one of my games? I don't! I can't even remember the last time! So stop talking _shit_ about my life, okay?"

TJ closed his eyes, realizing what he had just said. He began to try what he had heard that twerp Jonah Beck talking about in math class today-taking deep breaths and counting to ten. But halfway through his sixth breath, he couldn't remember if he was on nine or six. He tried to start again. Anger raced in his head. He hated the sounds of his own breathing. He hated the fact that his mother was just outside in the hallway. He hated that he couldn't even count to ten-he had never been  _that_ dumb before.

TJ clenched his jaw, opening his eyes and looking at his mother, who looked shocked. Served her right. He squinted. His vision was blurred from squeezing his eyes shut so hard. He couldn't think straight. His mother still wasn't moving.

Without knowing he was doing it, TJ grabbed the stupid Little League trophy still sitting on his shelf and chucked it at the wall next to the door. He watched as it collided with the wall, shattering into hundreds of little pieces.

Ms. Kippen looked scared, walking away and trying to avert her gaze from her son. TJ got up, shut his door, and laid back down on the bed, diverting his attention to the ceiling as if it was a sky full of stars and not a bunch of white paint with a small ceiling fan in the middle of it.

TJ wiped his wet eyes. He looked at his right thumb, which still had a speck of paint on it from when he took off Amber's nail polish. He looked at the empty space on the shelf next to his bed. He looked to the pile of glass and the dent in his wall.

Then TJ closed his eyes.


	4. Tutor

TJ went through three more tutors.

Mrs. Lloyd, the original one, had been nice enough. But when TJ had mixed up his multiplication tables the week after she told him to memorize them, she had told him he needed to follow instructions better. TJ had studied them even harder and tried again after that session, but had gotten confused the next time he saw her. "I can't teach you if you're not putting in any effort," she had told him before telling Mr. Collins she couldn't tutor TJ any more. "Come back when you're ready to put in effort, TJ."

TJ had wanted to punch a wall. 

Mr. Gil, an older man with a bushy beard was his next tutor, and had quit after TJ kept getting fed up at his math problems. He had told TJ he couldn't concentrate when TJ couldn't. Mrs. Peers, a high school Algebra 2 teacher, tried next, but she went into so much detail that TJ was even more confused than before. He told Mr. Collins about this, who just shook his head.

"TJ, I'm sorry, but Mrs. Peers was kind of the last resort! My schedule is already so busy I can't stay after school to help you, but I think you may be the problem."

He took a sip out of his _#1 Teacher_ mug.

"Everyone who tried to help you said you were unmotivated."

"Mr. C-" TJ started.

"I was still speaking. TJ, I'm sorry, but I'll have to tell Coach Harper about this."

TJ knew would get kicked off the team for sure if Coach found out. Coach Harper hadn't been aware of his second tutor, much less his third. "Mr. C," he pleaded. "Please. I'll try anything."

Mr. Collins pursed his lips, setting his drink down on his wooden desk. "Okay. I have one more idea."

 

"So someone _my age_ is going to have to tutor me."

Amber giggled. "If you're lucky, you'll get a real winner."

TJ glared at her. "It's not funny. What are they going to think of me? What are they going to tell everybody else?" He lowered his voice. "TJ? Yeah, I had to tutor that 'tard in seventh grade. He didn't even know how to multiply or divide."

"You don't know how-"Amber said, stopping herself before she could go further. Instead, she changed the subject. "How are things with you and Mom?"

TJ sighed. "Good. We're fine now. I think she just feels kinda bad about the whole thing."

"Do you?" Amber asked.

"Yeah. I do, too."

Amber looked at him. "You should tell her that." She glanced at the clock. "I gotta get to work. My shift is in twenty minutes." She jumped up, pulling on some socks and her Converse-High Tops. "Call me if you need anything!"

TJ nodded, waving his sister goodbye.

"Oh, and get off my bed, TJ!"

 

The fact that someone in his grade was going to tutor him had TJ thinking more about his appearance. How he treated other people. He had become so rude when he was first around Reed and Lester so much. But then his animosity towards others had escalated-even when his friends weren't around.

TJ thought maybe he should try to be nice for a change-when Lester or Reed weren't around, of course. He hated to think what people thought of him now.

_Thump._

 TJ took a step back. He had run into an opened door in the hallway. Taking a second to figure out where he even was, he heard voices to the left of him.

"You're kind of my last hope. We've been through a lot of tutors already." It was Mr. Collins.

"Sure. I'm happy to try. Who is it?" A girl's voice said. It sounded familiar.

"Oh! Well, as long as it isn't-"

Buffy. It was Buffy. And they were talking about him. TJ stepped into the room.

'Him?" Asked Buffy, obviously not happy. TJ had to admit, he had felt a little dismayed by her disappointment for a split second before he remembered it was Buffy.

"Her?" He asked in disbelief.

"No way!" Cried Buffy, shaking her head.

"I'm out," said TJ, turning to leave.

"You don't have an option!" His teacher called after him, causing TJ to turn around. "You fail this class, and you're off the team. You don't want that, do you?"

TJ watched Buffy try to hold in a laugh. "Only in my wildest dreams," the girl said, dragging out the word 'only'.

Mr. Collins looked confused. "What? He's your teammate."

Buffy shifted her weight to one hip. "And in his own wise words, which he recently shared with me," she said, picking up her backpack," that's not my problem."

 

TJ needed Buffy to tutor him. Basketball was practically his _life_ ; it was the only thing going good for him right now. So when he saw her in the lunch line the next day, he knew what he had to do.

"This is how it is, Buffy," he said, walking up. "You _have_  to tutor me."

She seemed amused.

"I'm team captain."

"Sure, TJ! Here's first lesson: X times Y equals _ain't gonna happen_."

"Well, if I'm not on the team," TJ said, "then you _ain't gonna_ win another game."

Buffy just looked at him. "If you don't pass me the ball, why should I help you pass a class?"

TJ stared at her. She knew how much he needed this, and she was holding it over his head.

"Fine. I'll pass you the ball."

Buffy looked off to the side.

"Do we have a deal?" TJ said, exasperated.

"No," said Buffy flatly. TJ glared at her. "You get my friend Cyrus, here," she continued, "a chocolate chocolate chip muffin. Then we'll have a deal." She glanced at the boy next to her. It was the same boy he had seen with Buffy at Red Rooster. The one that he had thought was ado-

TJ shook his head. "You can't get your own muffin?"

Cyrus turned to Buffy. "I didn't need this extra level of embarrassment."

TJ wanted to laugh at the way he had said that so quickly, like this was a sitcom. He'd timed it perfectly. Instead, he stayed quiet as best he could, with one eyebrow raised.

"...but no," Cyrus said, looking up at TJ.

TJ glanced behind him at the dwindling plate of muffins. "Well, I could do it, but...teach a man to fish?"

Cyrus smiled.

TJ hadn't made anyone smile in a long time.

He put his hand on the boy's shoulder. "You walk up to the muffin like you already own it." Cyrus stared at the muffin courageously. Buffy looked skeptical.

"He can't do that," she said, in a what TJ regarded as the most annoying voice known to mankind.

He looked at Cyrus. "Don't tell him what he can't do."

Buffy raised her eyebrows. Cyrus shot her a look. Was Cyrus about to favor TJ over his best friend?

"Dancing with danger _is_ on my bucket list," Cyrus said excitedly. He was such a dork. A very cute, dork.

TJ had to remind himself to stop thinking about that.

Cyrus turned back to TJ. "Then what do I do?"

TJ shrugged, smiling at him. "Take the muffin."

Cyrus smushed his face up. "That's it?"

TJ took a step closer to him. "Just don't let anybody stand in your way."

Cyrus slowly inched up to the front of the line. TJ gave him a little shove, sending the boy flying.

Cyrus reached up for the last muffin timidly. "Mind if I..."

Kids across the line started to shout in protest. Even the very back of the line jeered.

"Hey!" TJ shouted, walking up to Cyrus. "He's with me."

Everyone suddenly got quiet. Were this many people that scared of TJ?

Cyrus grabbed the muffin, holding it as if it was a precious jewel. "You're going to taste so sweet."

TJ strolled past Buffy, grazing her arm with his. "I'll need at least a C plus."

 

TJ grinned as soon as he was turned away from Buffy. He really did just do that, didn't he?


	5. Swings

  1. He finally had the right room. Right?



TJ walked in the doorway, relieved to see Buffy there.

“Finally!”

“Sorry,” he muttered. If only she knew why he was so late. “Forgot the room number.”

“And what time we were supposed to meet?”

TJ glanced at the clock. “I’m bad with numbers,” he said, trying to downplay the fact that he couldn’t even remember the time tehy were supposed to meet.

“Stop with the lame excuses,” said Buffy. “This isn’t gonna work if you’re not gonna take this seriously.”

TJ sat down at one of the desks, slinging his backpack down. He wondered how long Buffy would last before she too got fed up by his stupidity and quit, like all the others had.

Buffy sat down so she was facing him. “Please don’t waste my time, TJ. Are you going to take this seriously?” She asked, sounding like his mother.

TJ sighed. “Yeah,” he said in a monotone voice.

“Then let’s get started!” Buffy got up and clicked something on the teacher’s laptop. Mr. Collins’ PowerPoint from a few days ago showed up on the projector. TJ barely remembered it. He had been zoned out for the entire period the day he was supposed to be learning about the bar things on the outsides of numbers. “First, we’re going to work on how to evaluate an expression with variables.”

TJ rolled his eyes and leaned back in his chair. This was going to be a long lunch period.

 

Twenty minutes later, TJ had gotten every one of Buffy’s problems wrong. She even ran out of enough things to try and help that she started using basketball analogies. Really? Like that was the only thing he understood. He couldn’t even imagine how stupid she must’ve thought he was.

Buffy made him write out a multiplication table. Unable to do so, he dropped his pencil and looked up at her, one hand on the desk.

“You do know your multiplication tables, right?” She asked him in disbelief.

He didn’t answer. “Do you think I’m stupid?” he instead asked her.

“I never said that,” Buffy said, taken aback.

“Well, I am.” With that, TJ slung his backpack over his shoulder, leaving his notebook and pencil on his desk, and left her to revel in his own misfortunes.

 

As he exited the classroom, TJ ran smack into a hurried figure. Backing away, he looked to see who it had been.

Reed.

“What were you doing in there with _that_ chick?” He asked sharply.  “Wasn’t she the one dumb enough to join the boys’ basketball team?” Reed laughed.

 _Yeah, like Buffy was the dumb one,_ TJ thought. He stared at his shoelace, which had become untied.

Reed looked muddled. “Did you _hook up_ with her?”

TJ groaned. Reed was constantly talking about ‘hooking up’, not that TJ ever knew what type of ‘hooking up’ he meant. “No!” He tried not to think about how ironic Reed's accusation was when TJ had been doing  _that thing_ so much lately.

“Then what were you doing in there?”

TJ fiddled with the ties on his hoodie. “She was tutoring me, okay?”

“Tutoring you?”

“Yeah. My math grade was bad, so I have to do this if I have to stay on the team. Don’t…tell anyone, okay?”

TJ doubted Reed even heard the last of his statement he was laughing so hard. “Whatever, bro,” Reed finally said. “Have fun with your little tutor. You still gonna come and hang out at my place with Lester?”

“Yeah, yeah. We’re on, Reed.”

 

 

TJ didn’t end up going straight to Reed’s that day.

Instead, he absentmindedly wandered to the park. He hadn’t been here since the night before his last game.

No purpose in mind, TJ walked around. He passed the playground that he remembered visiting all the time as a kid, the hiking path that veered off into the woods, and the little gazebo that Amber had always liked. They had all been there for as long as he could remember. Nothing ever changed much in Shadyside.

When TJ awoke from his haze, he was right next to the swing set. He heard someone singing a song and swinging, creaking the swings.

TJ wasn’t sure, but he thought the boy looked like Cyrus. Buffy’s friend. The muffin kid.

TJ walked up once he had made up his mind it was him, leaning against the pole. “Nice song.”

Cyrus stopped swinging, looking a bit horrified.

“What do you sing when you’re on the slide?” Asked TJ.

Cyrus sang a little verse, still seeming scared.

“Huh,” said TJ, still baffled as to why he wasn’t making fun of Cyrus. “Did not expect you to have a song for that.” He smiled.

Cyrus smiled back at him, and damn, it felt good being nice. Maybe Cyrus even thought differently of TJ now.

TJ shifted against the blue pole. “Chocolate Chocolate Chip Muffin Guy, right?”

“Scary basketball guy.”

Maybe not.

“Actually, TJ,” he said, trying not to sound too disappointed.

“I know,” Cyrus said. “Cyrus.”

TJ stepped toward the other swing, looking around. “So, do you hang out here a lot?”

Cyrus was standing, propped up by the swing, by now. “Only when I’m feeling bad about myself,” he said. “So, fairly often.”

Cyrus must’ve either thought self-deprecating humor was hilarious or had zero self-esteem. TJ found himself hoping it was the first option.

“Oh,” TJ said. “Does it help?”

Cyrus shrugged. “It helps me.” He motioned to the swing next to him. “Go on, you look like you need it.”

TJ hopped on and started swinging. He hadn’t done this in so long. Cyrus was right-there was something about this that felt kind of therapeutic.

“Wow, this does kinda make me feel better,” said TJ, grinning. He swung higher.

“What do you need to feel better about?” Asked Cyrus. “You’re the captain of the basketball team!”

TJ smiled. “You don’t know me. I got stuff.”

“Betcha I got more stuff,” Cyrus said to him, looking sideways.

TJ somehow doubted that.

“Yeah?” Betcha I can swing higher!” This was surprisingly fun-TJ liked Cyrus. Reed and Lester could wait.

“I’m afraid to swing high,” Cyrus said. “That’s part of my stuff.”

He was afraid to swing high? Heck, TJ was swinging so high he flew off the seat every time he came up. “I don’t know why I ever stopped swinging!” He yelled. “C’mon. Get up here!”

“This is about as up as I go,” Cyrus said.

TJ smiled, getting an idea. He let out a holler and flew off the swing, thanking the heavens when he landed on his two feet. Then he ran over to Cyrus and gave him a push. Cyrus shrieked. He pushed Cyrus again, and quickly ran under him. “Underdog!” He yelled.

Cyrus was grinning, out of breath. TJ couldn’t imagine what he must’ve been like when he rode a roller coaster for the first time. “That was exhilarating!” Cyrus shouted, and TJ was so glad he was here and not at Reed's.

“Want another one?” TJ asked him, feeling exhilarated himself.

“No!”

“Oh, too bad.” TJ did it again, hearing Cyrus shriek and laugh.

Then, TJ heard that voice. “Cyrus! Are you okay?”

Buffy stood on the sidewalk, across from them. “TJ?”

TJ bit his lip, not knowing what Buffy was going to say or do. God. He shouldn’t have talked to Cyrus in the first place. “I’ve gotta go,” he said, quickly walking away.

Cyrus ran after him. “No! TJ! You don’t have to. Buffy, she’s, really cool,” he said.

“Yeah, no,” he said. “But, thanks for reminding me ‘bout swinging.” It’s like TJ could be nothing but nice to this boy. “That helped,” he smiled, looking straight at Cyrus.

There was this one second where they just smiled at each other in silence. When TJ’s heart started to speed up, he whirled around. This shouldnt have been “I’m out,” he called over his shoulder as he began to quickly walk away.

“Hold up a sec!” He heard Buffy cry after him. “Did you get my text?”

TJ pulled his phone out of his pocket. “Yeah.”

Buffy looked troubled. “Cyrus, could you give us the playground?”

“Yeah,” he said to Buffy. “You know where to find me,” he told her. He turned to TJ next. “And so do you.”

TJ smiled.

Cyrus left, and he looked at Buffy. “So. What’s the big news you had to tell me?” TJ snarked. He had somehow reverted back to his old self.

“So, I did some research, and I think I found something. You may have a problem with numbers.”

“You had to research that?” TJ asked her. What was this girl’s problem?

“No. I mean, I think you have a learning disability.”

A llllllllll learning disability? Didn’t kids with learning disabilities go to special schools and get pushed around in wheelchairs? TJ didn’t have a learning disability.

“It’s like dyslexia, but with numbers,” Buffy said. “I know it sounds bad, but this is actually good news.”

Did sssssssss she have the learning disability? “What’s good about it?” TJ asked.

“You can learn math. You’re just wired differently. The first step is to get you tested. We have to talk to Mr. Collins.”

“No, we, don’t have to do anything,” TJ said angrily. “And stop web-diagnosing my issues!”

“I’m sorry,” Buffy chortled. “I’m trying to help you.”

“Well, you’re not!” TJ said. She was doing the opposite of helping! “And don’t tell people I have a learning disability.” He shook his head. “I’d rather they just think I’m stupid.”

With that, TJ took one last look at her and stormed off.

 

 

He never did go to Reed’s. Once Buffy left the park, TJ went back to the swings. He swung, and he thought about what Buffy had said.

Could he really have this alleged learning disability? Math dyslexia? If so, what was he going to do about it? He couldn’t risk getting kicked off the team, but at the same time he couldn’t go around telling everyone he had a ‘learning disability’. TJ didn’t know. All he knew was that he had never been able to read or work with numbers very well. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t just really dumb.

He thought about Reed, too. What would Reed say? It felt like TJ was constantly worrying about what Reed and Lester and the other boys on the team would think before he did anything. Maybe that’s what he liked about Cyrus-the fact that he wasn’t like any of the boys he hung out with. Cyrus seemed like he was one of those people you felt like you could tell everything to without worrying about things like that.

TJ didn’t know why he was thinking about Cyrus so much, because he would probably never talk to him again. Cyrus was probably still scared of him after today. And if he hadn’t been, Buffy had probably told Cyrus all about how bad of a person TJ was anyways.

That's just how things seemed to work out for him.


End file.
